I first stumbled onto an episode of The Crocodile Hunter while I was on break from Pomona, at home in South Carolina channel surfing with my mom. It took about five seconds to draw us in – we couldn’t believe this person actually existed, charging in to grab crocodiles and snakes without fear, all the time positively on fire with enthusiasm and excitement. Say what you will about Steve Irwin’s hands-on methods: he made nature shows fun again, and we were hooked.

I didn’t have cable back at Pomona, and I tried in vain to describe Steve’s antics to my friends for a year or two until I remedied the cable situation. By that time, Steve Irwin was practically a household name, famous for his passion, insanity, and the childlike wonder he never lost towards wild critters.

Jeff, although not as big a fan of Steve, liked his shows well enough to dress up with me as Croc Hunters for our first Halloween together. Kids swarmed him as soon as we walked in the door.

We were out diving all day Monday, and came home to an email that Steve Irwin had been killed by a stingray. I hoped it was just another internet hoax making the rounds, but it didn’t take long to realize that the story was authentic.

I’m hearing “at least he died doing what he loved” a lot, a sentiment which has never rung true to me. He may have loved making documentaries, but I doubt he enjoyed taking a 6-inch serrated barb to the chest. It’s just a terrible, sucky thing to happen, and there’s no point trying to make it any more palatable.

Although not usually one to get weepy at celebrity deaths, I have to admit I’m really sad about this loss. No more Steve Irwin late-night interviews where he overwhelms his host with his energy (and his animals). No more good-natured spoofs of his style in commercials and comedy routines. No more chance to visit Australia Zoo and check him out in person one of these days – a dream of mine for years. I always thought his kids were so lucky to grow up with such an interesting and amazing dad – and now they won’t.

I guess what it comes down to is this: it made me happy to know that someone like Steve Irwin existed on this planet. Now he doesn’t, and I’m not ashamed to be sad about it.